


On The Grid

by Born In Captivity- Ineligible to Release (Jashasedai), Checoyourself



Series: Alternate Universe - Tame Racing Drivers [18]
Category: Formula 1 RPF, GP2 Series RPF, Motorsport RPF, The Grand Tour (TV) RPF, Top Gear (UK) RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe: Tame Racing Drivers, Doubles of Every Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-21
Updated: 2017-03-26
Packaged: 2018-10-08 16:28:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 11,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10391016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jashasedai/pseuds/Born%20In%20Captivity-%20Ineligible%20to%20Release, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Checoyourself/pseuds/Checoyourself
Summary: 2016 had been the biggest year in the history of Tame Racing Drivers.  Some men had broadcast a show explaining their captivity, and freed the "stables."  There had been 4 months of living in temporary camps until the laws of the world governments could be changed to recognize them as intelligent beings.  After over 100 years, Racing Drivers, now called Stigs in honor of the broadcast, raced- not forced by the company under a human's name, with a human to give the interviews and receive the glory, but as themselves, interviews included.  This was causing some confusion and much hilarity.





	1. Interviews

**Author's Note:**

> This is a LivePosting. It will be posted over the week of March 20-26 2017.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter features Mark Webber and his matched Racing Driver, Rabbit, interviewing drivers at the 2017 Australian Grand Prix.
> 
> First up, Alondra (matched to Fernando Alonso) then Prince (matched to Nico Rosberg.)

 

2016 had been the biggest year in the history of Tame Racing Drivers. Some men had broadcast a show explaining their captivity, and freed the "stables." There had been 4 months of living in temporary camps until the laws of the world governments could be changed to recognize them as intelligent beings. After over 100 years, Racing Drivers, now called Stigs in honor of the broadcast, raced- not forced by the company under a human's name, with a human to give the interviews and receive the glory, but as themselves, interviews included. This was causing some confusion and much hilarity.

 

 

Hardest to conquer was the Stigs' inability to speak, they communicated with body language, but it was impractical to learn in the weeks since they had become public knowledge. Sometimes impossible, without the help of someone a Stig had telepathically bonded to. So the humans whose names HAD been on the cars had the job of translating to the humans on the teams, at sponsorship events, and in interviews. This was much of what they'd already done over the years, but now their Stigs were openly the focus of the attention, for the first time, and Stigs can't understand acting.

 

 

Mark Webber was a journalist with an advantage- years of being matched with a Stig partner. They'd retired last year from endurance racing to commentate. Rabbit stood beside him, trying to gesture while holding a microphone, which was useless unless they wanted to catch the soft noise of an engine that was the voice of Alondra, Fernando Alonso's Stig. The man and Stig stood there, grinning with identical faces. Alondra answered the question Rabbit asked about teammates, and Fernando told the audience what his gestures meant. He watched carefully, though he could hear Alondra's thoughts like he heard his own.

 

 

"We are proud to race for Redbull, is a good team with a strong car. We get along with our teammate and his match." Fernando had a strong Spanish accent. Alondra nodded at him.

Rabbit responded directly to the gestures, unable to understand, even after 15 years of being around humans, any human speech. [What do you think about how quickly this Grand Prix was organized?] he signed.

[Recently all Stigs were in camps, now the race season is starting in all classes. It has been hard work. Volunteers make it possible,] Alondra paused and thought back over the weeks.

 

 

[The teams scattered. Not all of them have come back. Unmatched Stigs, retired matches and family members have pitched in to help. My pit crew has only two of last years' mechanics, and the rest are people who have stepped up.] Alondra patted Fernando on the back. [Fernando is usually tire mechanic, but he will be running the front jack. No one else was brave enough. The pit stops will be slow, the cars will not be at peak performance. We have put together this race in only weeks, we show the companies they can't stop us. It will improve.]

 

  
Mark smiled at the well considered answer, Alondra was always cagey. [Questions have circulated about the reliability of cars built by amateurs. I happen to know that the Stigs in your garage have never had mechanical training. What do you say to people who doubt?] Mark had asked everyone.

Alondra pointed to the garage. Men and women swarmed the car. Some humans, mostly Stigs. [Cars fail. They always have. They always will. I trust them. The proof will be on the track. This race will not be the benchmark of success as racing teams, but of ability to overcome adversity.]

 

 --

 

  
Mark spotted a familiar set of faces in the crowd. The 2016 World Champion. "Nico!" He yelled, waving the microphone he'd taken off Rabbit. "Bring Prince over!" They'd been teammates Prince's rookie year. Prince was barely recognizable. She had raced under Nico's name and gender for their 10 year career, and become the first mare F1 World Driver's Champion. Without her disguise, it was obvious she was female. With them was a stallion who looked like Nico, except for the sharp scar up his chin, over his mouth and along his nose. He trailed behind the other two, eyes down.

 

[This is Kaiser, he is my twin brother,] she introduced the stallion. He nodded and managed to look at them. She ran her fingers through her hair, prominantly displaying a feirce diamond ring.

Mark's jaw dropped.

[Oh don't encourage her,] Nico groaned, [She's been showing that thing to everyone.]

[I have an eternity, you're just jealous,] She rolled her eyes.

[I have one, too, and it's an eternity, not an eternity,] Nico waved the band from his wedding at her. Ring and eternity were synonymous.

[Introduce me!]

Nico smiled tolerantly. [Mark, I'd like to introduce you to Mrs Snap Hamilton.]

 

  
Rabbit revved in delight. He caught her hand and examined the ring. [Has Alondra seen this?!] he demanded.

She preened behind the jewel. [I will surprise him.]

[He will be angry that Snap did not ask him for permission,] Rabbit said.

[Snap asked MY permission,] Prince looked affronted.

[Tradition says grooms should ask bride's fathers,] Nico explained gently.

She put her hand over her mouth. [Oh! Snap should have asked him, since my sire was unavailable. Why didn't he?]

[It's Snap- Alondra would say no,] Nico said.

[Why else would he be angry? He could't tell Snap no.] Rabbit laughed.


	2. Swimwear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Ferrari team does a swimwear event for a sponsor.
> 
> Kleverig (matched to Kevin Magnussen) and Sunshine (matched to Sebastian Vettel.)

Kevin returned from a restroom break to find the Stigs had caused a scene. The swimgear company who was holding Ferrari's Australia Grand Prix sponsorship event had an overwhelmed young man organising the event. He looked at Kevin with pleading eyes and a vein throbbing in his neck.

"Can you get them to leave those birds alone and pay attention?"

Sunshine, Kleverig and Sebastian were beaming, spinning amidst a swooping screaming mass of hundreds of seagulls. They couldn't turn fast enough enough to watch enough seagulls. Chips from catering were scattered around them.

Kevin sighed. "When the chips are gone."

 

  
Raymond, the rep, handed them packages. Sebastian opened the plastic bags of red swim shorts with the Ferrari logo, Kevin lined up matching pairs of water shoes.

He looked up when Raymond gasped. Sunshine had stripped out of his clothes and was standing there in his skin.

Kleverig was holding the shorts up and shaking his head. [This won't cover even part of my chest,] he told Kevin.

Raymond had turned his back to Sunny's exhibition and was staring at the sky.

"Racing Drivers don't mind nudity." Sebastian laughed.

Sunshine pulled his shorts up.

"That one does!" Raymond indicated Kleverig.

 

"It's okay to show your tattoo now," Kevin told Kleverig, "No one minds if we don't match."

"They have never seen me...like that." He blushed, and his pale skin turned pink. "Will you wear shorts, too?"

"I'm not in the commercial, They just want you guys."

"Four drivers for the price of two!" Raymond jumped in.

Sebastian quirked an eyebrow. He told the man how much he'd gotttn for the last ad he'd done. Raymond didn't blink at the figure. Kevin did. "Double, if you want Kevin, too."

Kevin had gotten half that for HIS last ad. Ferrari had advantages.


	3. Zoo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Manor drivers Lynx (matched to Alex Lynn) and Lief (matched to Marcus Ericsson) do their sponsorship event at an animal sanctuary.

Lief walked hand in hand with Marcus through the zoo. Lynx was skipping ahead, turning backwards every few steps to encourage Alex to hurry. They were going to meet a real life lynx and some other zoo creatures.

The lynx was nice. Her name was Baba. The Stigs said it as well as they could.

There were some pictures. Alex and Marcus had to work hard to keep their partners looking at the cameras. When the producer tried to get the Stigs to act like their favorite animals, they froze.

[What did he just ask us to do?!] Lynx snarled.

 

[No! Not like that,] Alex soothed.

Marcus shook his head at the producer. [They just got freed from being livestock,] he waved the air in the tone-it-down gesture, [I don't think they want to play that game.]

Lief was standing head down, with his hands fisted at his sides. Marcus ran his hand over his back. 'It's okay, it's okay,' The blonde Stig told himself. [I was just startled,] he told his human. [Why did he ask that?]

[Sometimes...if everyone is safe, it's fun to do animal impressions. Like you do impressions of the other Drivers?]

[Animals don't talk, Marcus.]

 

"Rrrrawr Rrrawr," Lynx said, suddenly. It was clearly mechanical, clearly an engine noise, but also just as clearly, it was an impression of a dog barking.

[What was THAT?!] Alex asked. He looked at Marcus, who looked just as dumbstruck. He had been matched with Lynx for years and never heard him make any kind of noise even attempting to sound like an organic sound.

[Squat brown and white fur,] Lynx said.

"I know that word. It's Lewis's bulldog," Marcus told Alex. "Snap named him that. His name is Roscoe." He gestured and said, [Roscoe.]

[Roscoe is my favorite animal.]

 

Next they went to see the seals.

Beside the pool, both Stigs' attention was immediately on the dark shapes moving in the water.

The zookeepers called one up on the deck.

Both Racing Drivers screamed, pushed their humans behind them and started backing out of the pen. Neither match noticed at the time, but on rewatching the video, they discovered that Lief had frantically gestured, [Run, save yourselves!]

When the four of them had made it to the "Safety" outside the pen, Lynx, who had cuddled the wildcat in his lap with no second thoughts, gestured angrily, [What was THAT?!]

 

[A seal?] Alex asked.

[There were LOTS more of them. The water was f...full of them.] Lief let out a panicked sob and the blood drained out of his face. He bent over and threw up on the floor.

Lynx was washing his hands one over the other. He stood against Lief and stroked his back, nervously looking up and down the hallway.

[We need,] Lief gestured something. [We'll have to get help, killing them will take ages.]

[Some of them are going to get away,] Lynx fretted.

[We can't let that happen.] Lief straightened up. [It's up to us.]

 

Alex and Marcus did not translate this to the zookeepers. They seemed horrified enough that they had been herded away from their harmless animal. They weren't glad Lief had vomited on the floor, either, but that wasn't important. It was important to protect their Stigs.

[Why did it scare you?] Alex asked, [Seals are nice.] He wondered, suddenly why the Stigs, who'd almost all grown up in stables had a gesture for seals. Then why the word meant break-the-ground.

Lynx bit his lip. He stepped forward, touched his forehead to Alex's, wrapped an arm around him for security, and remembered.

 

The memory was tattered from being passed on. Bits had clearly been soldered in.

_Alex was crouching on the icy surface of the sea. He was wearing a helmet and clothes that were keeping him cozy in the freezing air. There was no movement, but he knew there were friends nearby._

_He crept forward. The ice didn't go on indefinitely. He was on a little flow. It wasn't even very big. The gap to the next flow was about 15 feet. The water was a black mirror._

_Something darted through it. He scrambled back from the edge._

_The ice tilted._

_He turned. The other side of the ice was sinking under the weight of a seal twice as long as Alex was tall. It pulled itself towards him, making the ice buck. Alex fell down. To his left, two other Racing Drivers started sliding of their hidden crouches. One was Orange, the other Blue._

_The Blue had a spear. He tried to steady himself to throw it, but the ice shook again._

_Alex was sliding towards the monster. It's head was huge, it's mouth strong enough to easily crush a Little Stig's helmet. In seconds he would be in range._

_The impatient monster made a swipe at his foot. He snatched it away. He could see arrows of water where other monsters swam, waiting for him to be pulled in for them._

_The spear flew, hitting the seal's face, not fatally, painfully. It screamed. Alex could feel it's hot breath on his legs, through his boots. He could smell the last Little Stig it had eaten. It slid backwards off the ice, into the water. The three Little Stigs scrambled into the center of the ice together, tucked themselves still, in the position, and waited for the monsters to leave._

_Alex couldn't tell how long he held the position, crouching, arms crossed, facing North and the sun; it was growing dark, hours since arrows had marred the water. Their stillness had saved them from detection. They moved slowly to the edge of the ice flow. It was silent. They slipped into the water and swam for the sea ice at the shore._

Lynx stepped away from Alex. He crossed his arms over his chest, to preserve heat while he stood silently, so the ice wouldn't resonate his steps. [Seals are NOT our friends.]

Alex turned to Marcus. "No more aquariums."


	4. Track Walk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seven (matched to Stoffel Vandoorne) is accompanied on his track walk by the second Stig (matched to Richard Hammond.)

Two Racing Drivers walked the Melbourne Grand Prix Circuit, with their matches trailing a long way behind them. One taller, in a white shirt and pants, and one in steel grey. They walked with their heads down, similar faces, like brothers, but with no relation.

The older, taller one, looked around the track. He was more interested in driving the same track all the time than the same car all the time. 'This track saved my life.'

Seven listened silently.

'I never stopped wanting to feel it.'

'Didn't you like Dunsfold?'

Top Gear's Second Stig nodded, 'But, it is different.'

 

'Where will you go now?' Seven asked, suddenly.

Stiggy shrugged. 'Next season we will go back to the Ice and see the Wild Stigs again.'

'What about driving? Where will Richard take you for a track?'

'There is a track near home we go to.'

Seven reached out and touched his arm, with a smile, 'Sometimes it is good having matches with no pressure to be the same!'

Stiggy laughed. 'We know they love us for being us.'

Behind them, Richard Hammond, Stiggy's match, who didn't match, nudged Stoffel Vandoorne with his elbow. "What do you think they're laughing at?"

 

"Us," Stoffel answered, "It's always us."

"That seems a little..." Richard began, then thought when he saw Stoffel level a look at him, "Are you sure?"

"Yes. Seven says since we don't really match he doesn't have to worry about pretending to please me."

"Is that a thing they do otherwise?" Neither of the Top Gear UK Stigs matches matched. Neither of them made a pretense of doing what their matches said over what they wanted.

"That's what they tell me," Stoffel laughed, "I'm just glad to have him, I don't want to push him if he doesn't like it."


	5. The Sydney Opera House

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Redbull team- Alondra (matched to Fernando Alonso) and Pilot (matched to Max Verstappen) have a sponsorship event at the Sydney Opera House.

The Sydney Opera House was an iconic place in Australia, not in Mebourne, but when the sponsors discovered Alondra loved music, they flew Redbull out for a tour.

"The arched shapes of the buildings were designed to resemble the sails of ships," the tourguide told them. He led them along the walk outside the building. Fernando and Max nodded as they translated this to Pilot and Alondra.

"I don't know how to sign ships," Max told Fernando.

[Yachts, like in the harbor at Monaco,] Fernando told them.

Both Stigs turned their head sideways and looked at the peaks and nodded.

 

 

"You must raise your voice, high, high, high, like the bird," The performer told Pilot. He sang a beautifully high note, eyes closing in bliss at the perfect tone. The two of them were sitting in the dressing room surrounded by costumes and makeup and casually interested other actors.

Pilot couldn't understand the words, but the man was wonderfully expressive with his body language and it was quite clear what he wanted. Pilot knew he had never been much of a singer, but he closed his eyes and tried to make the noise with his voice. It was not accurate.

 

 

"Work started on the building in 1959," the tourguide told his remaining audience. They walked through the Concert Hall. Fernando had been to many grand buildings and wasn't so impressed with this one in particular. The tour was filled with facts, but the height of the sails and how many tiles were in them was not information that filled him with awe. The buildings themselves were lovely, but he wasn't gaping around in wonder.

Max ran a hand over the soft fabric of the seats when the tourguide stopped to tell them how many people could sit in this room.

 

 

"No, no, like this," A woman said, touching her own throat, and gesturing [breathe,] without knowing it was a gesture. She sang a note as well.

The first performer nodded.

Pilot watched in fascination. He tightened his hands on his knees and shifted his seat on the prop crate. He controlled his breathing and sang. His voice was different than theirs, but he had heard Stigs sing the same notes as humans, before.

"You are flat," Another woman told him. She same over and sang a note that sounded different than the first two. Pilot sang it back identically- flat.

 

 

"Is there somewhere to eat?" Max asked.

"Why yes, there are three restaurants..." The tourguide started. He talked about them as they walked through high ceilinged, shining corridors. Fernando could see Max's excitment building. He remembered the hunger he felt as a constant, driving force, as a teenager. Maybe easier than most, because Alondra had kept feeling it long after Fernando had stopped, the age difference between them making itself felt.

Max's disappointment was palpable, when their next stop, instead of one of the restuarants, was another auditorium.

Racing Drivers and teenagers, Fernando reflected, could never get enough to eat.

 

 

Pilot watched the actors with a big smile. They were easier to understand, even with their indecipherable noises, than any humans he'd ever met. It was as though their meanings were always just out of reach. They moved with intent, though. They would be very fluent if they learned to gesture. He watched them argue about him.

Every human in the room was crowded around him, trying to figure out how to get him to make the right noises. This was a lot of fun. Everyone was so friendly, wanting him to sing to them. He was getting much better.

 

  
Max and Pilot were sitting in the box, waiting for the play to begin. Watching the performance was part of the event, and they had each been allowed a guest. Fernando and Alondra, invited Rabbit and Mark- who was pleased to share his national landmarks. Max had expected Pilot to invite Tumba. Instead he invited Daniil, necessitating that Max invite Tumba so as not to break up the set. The guests were seated behind the Redbull team, for filming purposes, and Pilot was leaned over his seat telling Tumba how he'd spent the day having voice lessons from the cast.

 

  
Fernando came into the box and sat in the seat on the end, leaving a space. He was dressed neatly in a tuxedo, as were the rest of them. Rabbit's and Tumba's had dark blue pocket squares, and Pilot's had red.

"Where is Alondra?" Max asked him. His pocket square was black, like the rest of the humans'.

He shook his head. "The crew wanted to film one more shot with him."

"I haven't seen him all day."

He shrugged in response, "He tells me he is fine, is working."

"Working?" Mark asked. "Without you? Who was translating?

Fernando shrugged.

 

  
"The Sydney Opera House welcomes you to our production of Richard III will begin momentarily. In honor of some special guests, we have arranged a performance of the Duet of Doge and Amelia from Verdi's Simon Boccanegra," a voice announced.

"Look at the subtitles," Max exclaimed, pointing at a screen to the side of the stage with the translation in English along the bottom. The main part of the screen was taken up with an image of a Tuxedo wearing Daniil translating the words into Stig gestures. "So THAT'S where YOU'VE been all day." Max pointed at Daniil, who grinned.

 

  
The lights came down, the curtain rose. On the stage was a woman and an older male. The music began. The woman turned and sang. After a moment the male turned around. The song was about a father and daughter, reunited after thinking they'd lost one another forever. He sang with a deep voice, full of love, full of the ache of a father who'd lost his child.

His voice hit every note perfectly, but he never sang a word. He sang like a perfectly tuned engine.

As the last note faded away, the audience stood and applauded.

Alondra bowed.

 

  
Everyone clapped Fernando on the back. He was BEAMING. "Look at the subtitles now," he laughed.

Daniil laughed in anticipation of the joke.

The subtitles read "When performance matters... it has to be powertec."

[That was where he was all day?] Pilot asked, [I was having voice lessons and he was not and he got to sing everyone a song.]

[Keep up your voice lessons and you might get to sing next time,] Tumba told him.

[Alondra will teach you. Even the car was a better singer than Fizz when they started, but he's very good, now,] Rabbit told Pilot.


	6. The Press Conference

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first press conference featuring Racing Drivers is anticipated to be a little unusual. The press are practically fighting for seats. The room is filled to capacity, in fact, it’s standing room, only. The matches have been asked to come act as translators. Sunshine and Sebastian, Alondra and Fernando, Snap and Lewis, Wendy and Francesca, Mick, and Felipe file into the room and sit down.

the RD's ignore the interviews, interupt, monologue, interview each other, rewrite the script, chat with audience members, interview people not part of the press conference, and drop huge personal revelations

Press Conference

They sat at a wider set of tables than usual because the Stigs had to have seats for their matches. The moderator opened the press conference.

"This is the 2017 Melbourne Grand Prix Drivers Press Conference." The man announced. "On the top left we have the Stig, Wendy Linossi a rookie driver from Toro Rosso and her match Francesca Linossi translating. Center middle we have Mick Schumacher, former F2 driver, son of Michael Schumacher and rookie from Force India. Top right we have Felipe Massa, who will be driving for the first time on his own as a rookie for McLaren. On the bottom left we have Snap Hamilton, driving his 10th year in F1 and his 4th season for Mercedes and his match Lewis Hamilton translating. Bottom center we have Alondra, driving his 15th year in F1, and his first year for Redbull and his match Fernando Alonso translating. Bottom right we have Sunshine Vettel, driving his 11th year in F1 and his 3rd season for Ferrari, and his match Sebastian Vettel translating. "

"My comments will be translated for the Drivers by Eddie Jordan. First of all welcome to the Stigs, who will be participating in a press conference for the first time. Now, for our translators, Francesca, Felipe, Lewis, Fernando and Sebastian, you are familiar with the proceedings, to clarify for our audience, you are here to translate what the Stigs say, we are not simply listening to your words."

"That's true, we are just here for them," Sebastian said into his microphone.

"Which is pretty much how it was, before," Lewis added.

"Alright, our first question goes to Felipe. You have been in F1 for years, but always as a match, this year you are here as a driver, in fact, you are on a team with your Stig. How is the trackside experience different as a driver?

Felipe smiled into his microphone. "Well, when I have been here, before it has always been as a member of the support team, I was assisting my Stig, Mancha, in preparing for and participating in races. I was translating for the team and doing media events, only. I spent years racing, before Mancha and I were matched, and it is much more exciting being in the car, being a part of the action that makes the sport."

"Mick, you are the only man on the track without a match. You will be handling media events and racing, how will that effect your performance on the track?"

Mick, who had been expecting a legacy question, was a little thrown by this, and stared for a moment. "This year all the drivers will be handling media duties and all the racing. For the first time. I am impressed by Felipe and Valtteri, who are both doing it for themselves and helping their Stigs. I think I will be just as capable of handling both sides of racing as the rest of my colleagues. I feel confident about my performance on the track, but you never know until you get out there. We will just have to see."

"Wendy, you are the first mare to race openly in Formula 1. The first mare in 25 years to race openly as a female...how do you think that affects your perceptions of the sport?"

Alondra, watching the moderator's translator with increasing consternation, made a screeching brakes noise. [Do not answer that!] He told Wendy.

[I wasn't going to. What does it matter if I am a mare and not a stallion?!] Wendy glared at the man.

Alondra waved a hand at the moderator. [You cannot say things like that. It is extremely rude. I will not stand for it.] He thwaped Fernando's arm as Fernando repeated the words in English. [Tell that man to ask her a question worthy of a Racing Driver. She is a Racing Driver.]

Fernando frowned at the thwap, but then smirked deeply at the moderator. "He says you must ask her a new question."

Sunshine and Snap were cross armed, as offended by this line of inquiry as Alondra.

"This is the question I have to ask, it's on the list," The moderator said.

Alondra shook his head. [I will do it, then.] He turned around and rested his elbow on the upper table. [Wendy, you used to race Endurance and Touring Cars, now you will be racing open wheel cars. Will that difference make you faster against the other drivers?]

"No," The moderator said, "You can't just rewrite the questions."

Everyone ignored him, except Sebastian and Lewis, who looked at him with a moment's pity before turning to listen to Wendy's answer.

[The passing is much more difficult for open wheel racing, but because of that, Touring Car drivers have to learn to defend very well, also, there is much more downforce in a Formula 1 car, and this makes the cornering very different. The other drivers have more experience in open wheel cars than I do, but I think that will make my driving style more difficult for them to counter. I am expecting to do well.] She smiled down at Alondra.

"That isn't the question people want to know, people want to know about how difficult it will be to be a female in motorsports," The moderator complained.

"Maybe it's none of their business, and if they didn't treat her differently, it wouldn't BE difficult," Lewis said in a low voice. He lifted a hand off the table and waved a little at where Nico and Prince were standing in the back of the room. Snap waved, too, much more vigorously.

[My mother was a mare,] Sunshine put in, helpfully.

"Maybe we could just move on," called a voice from the audience.

The moderator shook himself. "Snap, the championship battle was pretty fierce for you last year, you ended up losing your bid for a 4th world Championship when your teammate won the Brazilian Grand Prix. Did that effect your momentum? The cars are very different, and the circumstances quite unusual, will you be challenging for a Championship this year?"

Snap shook his head happily, [No, I am just as fast as always. I think we will have a chance for a Championship. I have been able to have a great teammate who has been the best competition I could ask for, for these last years. She's right over there,] He pointed at Prince and cameras turned to where Prince and Nico were standing at the back wall. Suddenly in front of a lot of cameras, unprepared, Prince blushed and hid behind her hair. Nico put an arm around her and waved and nodded. Lewis couldn't keep the laughter out of his voice as he translated for Snap, [We got married last week. I was really proud when she won her Championship last year.]

Prince blushed. She put one hand on her hip and pointed at him. [Snap, I am going to get you for this,] She couldn't keep the fake anger on her face for very long, though and she gave him a little wave back. [I like your interview, go back to work,] She made a shooing motion.

"Hey!" Fernando yelped.

[You WHAT?!] Alondra had half climbed over him and grabbed Snap's left hand. He looked at the ring, and then at the other ring on Prince's hand. He waved both hands in the "What Have You Done" gesture. [You married him?! It is McLaren all over again! Again!] He threw himself back into his chair and crossed his arms with a pout.

Fernando was translating this distractedly while examining the ring Snap was now holding up for his inspection. "This is a good stone," He told Lewis.

Alondra froze.

"Yeah, it's very good. It's flawless, colorless, and it was cut by one of the best gemstone cutters on the planet. That's nothing, you should see the stones in HER ring."

Alondra turned very slowly to look at Prince. He held out a hand and waved, [Come here,] with his most patient face.

Prince made her way around the press and stopped in front of the table and held her hand out.

"We really need to keep going with the press conference..." The moderator said.

"If you think we haven't all cleared our schedules for THIS, you're nuts!" Shouted one of the journalists.

"Let him talk to her, man, she's his BEST FRIEND," That was Mark Webber. There was a rev of agreement from Rabbit.

Alondra was standing, leaning over the table, looking at the ring from all directions. It had two large, perfect diamonds on it. He looked up at the blonde mare. He smiled a little and held his hand to her cheek. [What beautiful diamonds.] He kissed her cheek and wrapped her in a hug. He turned to Snap. [You brought my girl diamonds.] He nodded. [Alright.] He nodded again. He patted Snap on the shoulder. He sat down primly in his chair and gestured at the moderator, [Go on.]

"I thought Rabbit was his best friend," Felipe said to Sebastian.

Sebastian turned to him and shrugged with a little shake of his head. "You don't want to know."

The moderator, now thoroughly ruffled, said, "Uhh, Alondra," He was clearly dreading asking the least focused Stig at the conference a question. "With the Stigs' actual vital statistics being released, it has come to light that you still hold the record for the youngest winner of a Grand Prix, the youngest Champion and the youngest Double Champion. If the superlicense requirements don't allow for drivers under 18 to drive in F1 any longer, it is unlikely these records will ever fall. You are a young Stig, before the end of the last season there was some discussion of your retiring if you didn't find the cars this year to be fun to drive. Were those Fernando's words, or yours? If you don't enjoy this year's car, will you be retiring from Formula 1?"

[When FIA is in control, Racing Drivers retire when they are told. We go live at the stable, be alone, no match, no racing. Racing Drivers all try to race as long as they may. Now, I discuss my career with my partner, decide what to do, choose when to retire.] He sat back and crossed his arms. [I am still a young Stig. It is not yet.]

Fernando looked at him, [Records.]

[I have been youngest to race, win, have Championships? Maybe,] Alondra shrugged one shoulder. [Racers younger than I have been Champions, and racers older than I have been Champions. What do records mean to me? Only numbers.]

The moderator cast a pleading look at Sebastian. "Sunshine," He began.

Sunshine took the moderator's translator saying this as a sign that it was his turn to speak. [Hello, I am Sunshine,] He grinned broadly and waved, [That's my sister, over there,] He pointed, too and the cameras panned back around to Prince.

She flicked a hand in annoyance, [It is not the Prince show, stop making everyone look at me!]

[She is a world Champion, I am very proud of her! My best friend, Jaamies, is a world Champion, too, I am very proud of him, too. He's not here, his man hates talking to people when he's busy doing his work. It is hard to talk to Racing Drivers, I mean, Stigs, inside and humans outside at the same time, and the humans don't really need his attention, because you all have other people you can talk you. You can ask me questions any time. I like talking about racing. Don't ask me questions about balls, though, that's private. Sebastian can joke about balls, but I am not going to. And those girls without enough shorts on and the signs, I don't really know anything about those, either, they just stand there. Humans might think they are pretty, but most of them don't race, and I like to talk about racing, best, so I don't really have anything to say about them,] He looked to the side and thought for a moment.

He pointed out into the audience, [That's Mark and Rabbit,] After Prince's chastisement, the cameras didn't pan around automatically, so Sunshine gestured at them to do so.

Mark and Rabbit gave each other nervous looks.

[Rabbit was my lead stallion at Redbull when I was a colt and a young stallion. When we were on a team together, that was really me and him, not Sebastian and Mark, everyone noticed we didn't get along. Redbull was mean to Rabbit, they gave his car parts that weren't as good and sometimes they told him to slow down. That wasn't fair and Rabbit didn't win because of it. You should all write that down so the humans all know. Rabbit should have won more. He's very good. He got his Championship right away when he went to Porsche.] Sunshine nodded. He nodded at Sebastian, who nodded back at him.

The moderator put his hand over his eyes and muttered something.

[When I started racing,] The cameras panned back to Sunshine, [The tires were better. Someone should do something about that. These tires are no good. Once during a race, my tire exploded. It ruined my race.] He nodded at Sebastian. Sebastian nodded back.

[The cars are too full of fuel at the beginning of the races,] Snap said.

[The first corner is hard when the car is so slow,] Felipe added.

[All my corners were slow last year,] Alondra said, mournfully. [I'm glad we are refueling this year.]

[Fuel stops are dangerous!] Sunshine waved at him. [Kuiva caught Jaamies on FIRE!]

"Ukkonen had a refueling fire once. Burned his mustache right off," Lewis said.

[Max's father's Racing Driver had a BIG fire,] Sunshine turned around to Felipe. [Mancha pulled the fuel hose off that time in Singapore, it was good HE didn't have a fire.]

Felipe's face was drawn with the remembered fear. He looked to the back of the room where Mancha was, and his eyes lost focus.

[I don't like fuel stops,] Sunshine concluded.

There was an expectant pause, but he didn't go on and the moderator realized Sunshine had finished his introductory monologue. He seemed even more hesitant to ask Sunshine a question than he had to ask Alondra a question. "With all the differences this year, do you think you will have a chance at the Championship?" The man blurted the question, as though it would increase the odds of Sunshine answering it quickly. The entire point of this hope was lost, because Eddie Jordan translated the signs at a normal speaking pace.

[No. All my mechanics went to work for Mick.] Sunshine looked at him politely, waiting for the rest of his question.

[You have mechanics,] Lewis leaned past Snap to gesture at Sunshine.

[Yes. Sebastian has the right hand tires changed and the left rear tire changed perfectly every time.]

[Why not the left front tire?] Wendy asked.

[One of the volunteers does that tire. He does it perfectly as well. It is just more slowly than I would like. He is getting better, now that his foot is healing.]

Sebastian tapped Sunshine, [Keep facing the cameras.]

[Wendy is behind me, I cannot see what she is saying if I don't look.]

[You aren't supposed to be talking to the other drivers, you are supposed to be talking to the cameras.]

Felipe snorted loudly.

Sebastian looked at him in confusion.

"Simi," Felipe said.

Sebastian's eyes narrowed.

"The only ones who whispered more during press conferences were Fernando and Mark." Lewis said.

"Sebastian and Kimi whispered MUCH more than Mark and I!" Fernando protested.

[You and Mark whispered during interviews?] Alondra asked Fernando, [I did not know this.] He turned to the audience, [Rabbit, did you know Fernando and Mark whispered during their interviews?]

[Yes,] Rabbit gestured back.

[You and Kimi whispered during interviews and you are complaining that I am answering Wendy's question?!] Sunshine said to Sebastian.

"Sebastian and Kimi were the worst," Fernando crossed his arms.

"No," said a quiet voice. "My dad and uncle Ralf were the worst. They didn't even have to be next to each other. They'd just lean over whoever was between them, look." Mick showed his phone to Wendy and Francesca.

Fernando, the only driver old enough to remember having been in press conferences with Michael and Ralf, nodded.

Mick passed his phone to the lower table. Lewis, Snap, Fernando and Alondra laughed. Sunshine looked at the picture Mick had found online, while Sebastian held the phone. [This is your father, and Ralf and Lentaa's Mika,] he told Mick, as if he didn't know this. [They are brothers like we are brothers.]

Mick grinned at Sunshine, "I know."

Felipe looked over at him, his face placid, and then put his mouth by the microphone. "Mancha and I are brothers. Twins."

The murmer of voices went on a few seconds longer, before dying away into silence.

"Hmm." Said Mark Webber.

There was more silence. Lewis and Snap were looking at Felipe in consternation. Francesca was shocked, Wendy was looking around to gauge by the reactions whether statements like this were a normal part of press conferences. Fernando and Alondra were sitting with their hands folded, completely still, looking out at the audience. Sebastian and Sunshine were watching him with narrowed eyes.

Felipe was still leaned into the microphone, waiting for a reaction.

"But you can TALK." Lewis blurted, jumping immediately to a conclusion.

He looked down at Lewis and nodded, slowly. "And Mancha can't."

"You're half Racing Driver, half human," Mick said.

He turned and looked at him and nodded. "Just like the rest of the matches, but we share the halves differently."

Lewis looked at Fernando to share his shock and realized Fernando wasn't reacting. "You've got nothing to say about this?" He demanded.

Fernando shrugged. "Is not change their racing. Is not matter to ME."

Lewis gasped. "You knew! When, since you were teammates at Ferrari?"

[I knew,] Alondra told him. He patted Felipe's hand.

[That's not fair! A half Racing Driver match makes you faster,] Snap started, then paused.

[A half Racing Driver with a half Racing Driver match isn't faster than a full Racing Driver and a human match. It is just a different configuration. A full Racing Driver and a half Racing Driver match would be faster, but that wouldn't be unfair, either, because they would have to overcome two Racing Drivers' inability to disperse emotion without help.] Sunshine told Snap.

"Can you send?" Sebastian asked. "Was Mancha stopping the other Racing Drivers from hearing you?"

"I was stopping them from hearing me, myself," he blinked and all the Stigs but Alondra, and Mancha, standing against the backwall, gasped.

[I can HEAR you,] Snap said. He squeezed Lewis' hand. [He really can, he really IS like he says.] He went still. [Mancha got his Championship, but you didn't? That's so sad. No wonder you two stopped talking.] He reached out and touched Felipe's other hand.

The other Stigs at the table put their hands on his as well.

"We were supposed to take questions..." The moderator said. "Now we are out of time."

"This was very enlightening," David Coulthard said.

The Racing Drivers and matches and Mick and Felipe all began to stand up and take off their microphones.

"It was, wasn't it?" Mark agreed.

Rabbit revved and stood to add his support to Felipe and Mancha, who were now forehead to forehead, smiling at each other. The rest of the Stigs were crowded around them, offering congratulations and love.

"This has been the 2017 Formula 1 Australian Grand Prix," The moderator said, with defeat in his voice as the Racing Drivers filed out, followed by the extremely pleased journalists. "For a transcript, you can check our website at Formula1.com."

 


	7. Neighbors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the Racing Drivers are freed, there were a lot of retirements, and a lot of the faces on the grid are not so familiar. Jolyon Palmer’s Racing Driver, Tenner, is a little alarmed by the prospect.

[The neighbor is an endurance mare,] Tenner looked around the barrier between the garages. The teams had two weeks to get things together. The cars had been the focus, Stigs could manage themselves, be prepared to drive or not. [What if she does something weird?]

Jolyon tightened a strut bolt to hand tightness and started with the wrench. [Lince was your tester at Renault, she didn't do anything weird.]

Tenner pushed away from the wall and padded over. [Lince and Carmen are normal. They drive F1. What if she thinks I'm too hyper?]

[Kleverig _always_ called you hyper.]

[He DID?!]

 

  
Tenner's head whipped around. [She's coming! HIDE!] He hunkered behind Jolyon, tucking up small beside the wheel.

Jolyon kept working.

Francesca Linosi and her Racing Driver, Wendy waved at him from in front of the garage.

He waved back. He bent to look at his work and gestured subtly to his partner. [I think you would like her. Go say hi.]

[What makes you think that?] Tenner peeked out and ducked again when he saw Wendy looking.

[Look how she's dressed,] Jolyon hinted.

Tenner peeked again. [Oh...I love her,] he breathed, becoming tender hearted.

Wendy was barefoot, just like Tenner.


	8. Redbull Promo Shoot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 2016 had been the biggest year in the history of Tame Racing Drivers. Some men had broadcast a show explaining their captivity, and freed the "stables." There had been 4 months of living in temporary camps until the laws of the world governments could be changed to recognize them as intelligent beings. After over 100 years, Racing Drivers, now called Stigs in honor of the broadcast, raced- not forced by the company under a human's name, with a human to give the interviews and receive the glory, but as themselves, interviews included. This was causing some confusion and much hilarity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Redbull teams participate in a promo photo shoot, but not without shenanigans.

Checo and Wendy posed holding Red Bull cans, smiling. He remembered Sergio doing a shoot similar to this one for another drink company. He also remembered he wasn't allowed to drink any, even though it smelled good. Checo looked over to where Sergio was watching, and slowly moved his hand to open the tab on the can. He was chatting with Francesca, distracted. Checo jumped a little when the tab popped open, making noise. Sergio still hadn’t noticed. The photographer smiled in encouragement.

“Yeah, that’s great! Action shots!” He said. He took a swig and made a face at the carbonation. The photographer continued snapping away, chuckling to himself at the expressions Checo was making. Wendy saw Checo trying the drink, so she too popped her can open and tried it, making a similar uncertain face at the new taste. Sergio looked over to his match and his eyes widened.

[What are you doing?!] He gestured frantically. Checo gave him a cheeky smile.

[If I’m going to endorse this product, I should drink it.] He said, taking another swig and making another face. Sergio sighed and looked to Francesca. 

“They’re going to be so wound up later.” He said a little defeatedly. Francesca laughed. 

“Nothing we can’t handle, surely.” She said. Wendy smiled and waved to her match. 

[It’s very sweet, but I like it!] She said before settling back into various poses with Checo. Max, Pilot, Fernando, and Alondra soon entered the studio in their Redbull gear. Pilot and Alondra stood over by the photographer, awaiting instructions. Fernando and Max plopped down next to the other matches. 

“How has it been so far?” Max asked.

“Nothing crazy, Checo started drinking the props. They’re doing really well. He’s a ham.” Sergio replied, looking over to where Checo was doing jumping jacks with Wendy, both laughing. He had removed his racing boots to match her. After their individual and team shots, the photographer added in Alondra and Pilot. The four of them took a few decent “professional shots” before the shenanigans began. While Fernando was busy talking to the others, Checo snuck Alondra a can. Fernando soon turned to see what his match was excited about, and ran over when he saw Alondra chugging an energy drink. 

[What is that?] He gestured, a small sense of panic forming in his chest. Could Stigs handle energy drinks? Alondra wasn’t used to that much sugar in one serving. Once it hit his bloodstream he was bouncing all over the studio. Fernando decided to bargain.

[If you calm down and finish this, I’ll take you out to the gravel trap for a bit, okay?] He asked, desperate for Alondra to be agreeable. Luckily he was, and settled down to take the last few shots with Pilot, and a few by himself. The photographer asked if anyone wanted any cans for the road, and was met with a resounding no from the four matches. But unbeknownst to Sergio, Checo was behind the screen stuffing his backpack with cans.


	9. Sharing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 2016 had been the biggest year in the history of Tame Racing Drivers. Some men had broadcast a show explaining their captivity, and freed the "stables." There had been 4 months of living in temporary camps until the laws of the world governments could be changed to recognize them as intelligent beings. After over 100 years, Racing Drivers, now called Stigs in honor of the broadcast, raced- not forced by the company under a human's name, with a human to give the interviews and receive the glory, but as themselves, interviews included. This was causing some confusion and much hilarity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A small continuation of "Redbull Photo Shoot"

After the photoshoot Checo visited Hulk in the Haas motorhome. He held his hands behind his back as Hulk walked over to him, a curious look on his face.

‘What do you have behind your back?’ He asked, trying to move faster than Checo to get around him to see. Checo smiled and produced a can of Redbull. He held it out for Hulk to take, a gift.

‘It makes you feel like you can fly.’ Checo said, trying his best to remember the tagline. Hulk took the can from him and inspected it. 

‘It makes you feel fast?’ Hulk asked, skeptical. Checo nodded with a smile. Hulk thanked him for the gift, cracked the tab open and tried it out. He smiled wide as he began to feel a slight buzz.

‘It does make you feel fast. Thank you!’ He hugged Checo and returned to his work. Checo walked back to the Toro Rosso garage and told Sergio what he had done. Sergio began laughing. 

‘Nico isn’t going to be able to keep him quiet for a second. Brilliant.’ Sergio said with a mischievous smile.

_____________________

Over in the Sauber garage a similar scene was playing out. Checo had given Wendy a can to take with her, but she decided to gift hers as well. Wendy handed a can to Tenner. he took it shyly, trying to hide his nervousness. 

[Thank you, I can’t wait to try it. Did the photoshoot go well?] He asked her. She nodded and gave a brief recap, mentioning that they even let her do her photos without her shoes.

[I like that we think the same. I knew I’d like you when I noticed you don’t wear shoes either.] Wendy said. Tenner looked at her, surprised.

[I thought the same about you.] He confessed. Jolyon called him from the back of the garage. [I’ll find you later, okay?] He asked with a hopeful smile. Wendy returned it. 

[Of course. You know where to find me.] She said, giving a small wave as she left. Jolyon placed a hand on his match’s shoulder.

‘Told you. I knew you two would get along great.’ He said, gloating a little. Tenner flushed and scampered to the back of the garage, telling Jo to shut up the rest of the day.


	10. Redbull Boys and Fili

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daniil Kvyat, Daniel Ricciardo and his Racing Driver Oz (Daniel, Daniil and Tumba (Daniil’s RD) are now retired and studying physics (Oz is retired and studying Architecture) visit Mercedes’ rookie Driver, Fili and his match, Carlos Sainz Jr.
> 
> Also appearing Daniil’s Racing Driver, Tumba, Max Verstappen, Francesca Linossi and their Racing Drivers, Pilot and Wendy.

[She's a beaut, mate,] Dan told Fili. The Mercedes looked a little cobbled together, but she was low, silver, sleek.

Carlos patted her. [We have worked hard.]

Fili tied the arms of his overalls around his waist. [She is the best I have ever driven.] The 5 of them went out of the Mercedes garage. [I will be back later,] Fili waved as they walked past his teammate's garage. Lewis and Snap waved.

[I miss you and Tumba on the grid,] Fili told Oz.

[You can come drive with us at the Village. Lessons in the morning, racing all afternoon.]

 

  
[How are your lessons?] Carlos smiled.

[The maths and reading are very difficult, Tumba teaches us to read and Cooler teaches us numbers. The design classes are easy.] Oz grinned and waved as they walked through the paddock, greeting all the personnel and drivers. [Buildings are exciting, I like to draw them.]

[When will you MAKE a building?] Fili hooked an arm in his friend's.

[A long time from now. I will start making small practice buildings soon,] his gestures were a little hampered by Fili hanging onto his arm, but he indicated a small cube in front of himself.

 

[What about learning how small things move?] Fili asked Daniil.

[Physics? It's good.] Daniil pooched his chin out and nodded. [There is a Wild Stig in our class. An electrical engineer from the Ice, has a translator from the Grand Tour film crew and everything, and got in a screaming match with the professor about an obscure theory. I don't think they didn't know it was a screaming match, the translator kept calm, but Dan and Tumba and I knew.]

[The next day the professor came in and apologized for telling her she was wrong.] Dan grinned hugely at this.

 

  
[When ARE you going to come visit us at the Village?] Oz asked Carlos. [We miss you.]

[Summer break. You've got a place for us to stay, right?] Carlos answered. They walked right into the Redbull/Toro Rosso hospitality. The rest of the Redbull Boys and Francesca and Wendy were sitting at the big table. They sat together. Tumba reached from between Pilot and Wendy and held Daniil's hand.

[There are plenty of empty places, or you can stay with us, if you like,] Dan told him.

[You are coming to visit? You can stay with us!] Pilot told Fili.

 

  
[Don't you mean they can stay with US?] Daniil chuckled. [You and Max will will be gone for the season, too.]

Tumba frowned and lifted his hands to correct his human, but Daniil shook his head. [Joking, I'm joking.]

Max grunted, [We are paying just as much of the rent. We must be the easiest roommates, we are never there.]

[Don't worry, we keep your Playstation company,] Tumba told Max, then turned to Fili, [Do you like Little Big Planet?!]

Fili lit up and shimmied excitedly. [I don't know what that is!]

Max frowned. [You use the Playstation? Without us?]


	11. Prince and Snap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prince has retired to pursue dance as a career. Snap is now the senior Mercedes Driver. She comes to visit him in the garage, and brings their family.

The senior Mercedes driver signalled to his match that the car seemed right. Lewis translated this to the mechanics around the car, they were a mix of humans and Stigs, three of the humans couldn't sign. Snap stood up and climbed out of the silver car.

He took his human self's hand. 'She won't be as tight as last year's car. Maybe never again. She will be FUN to drive. This year will be much more fun than last year, Lewis. Do you think?'

'It will be easier,' Lewis agreed, 'Without all the fighting.'

Snap rolled his eyes. 'Yes, finally.'

 

He turned, a small smile on his face. The voices were audible, even to Lewis. Like little lawn mowers, and a soft human laugh. A blonde man and a blonde mare and stallion came around the corner of the garage. There were 5 foals with them. Twin boys, a same age girl and boy, and a toddler. The foals ran up to Snap.

[Papa!]

He knelt and collected them all into a huge hug. He raised his eyes to their mother in delight.

Lewis stepped past him and kissed her on the cheek. [Enjoying retirement, Prince? Missing the driving yet?]

 

  
[No. Too busy with my second career,] She told him.

[Are you missing US already?] Nico stepped forward and shook his old rival's hand.

[Not on your life,] It was easier, now, to joke, to let past resentments go. [How are you doing, Kaiser?] Lewis waved at the stallion that looked nearly identical to Nico. He wasn't comfortable with human touch, yet.

[These cars are wonderful. I thought I couldn't be happier for Prince's career, until I saw these.]

[Would you like to drive mine sometime?] Snap asked.

Lewis, Prince, and Nico stared at him. Racing Drivers hated sharing vehicles.

 

  
The blonde stallion looked shocked, too. He blushed pink. It highlighted the white scar across his face. He looked at his sister. 'Did he ever let you drive his car?' He sent the thought to her mind.

'He barely even let Lewis sit in it. The testers used my car.'

Kaiser watched her eyes. 'He loves you very much.'

'I think he wants to see if he got the better end of the deal with me as Nico's match,' She thought back to him, with a wink.

'You were always faster, that's why you went with Nico.'

'Maybe not now.'

 

[Can I drive your car, papa?!] One of the older colts asked suddenly. He was about 8, watching the discussion, closely.

[No, Nico,] Gestured his twin. [You are too short.]

[You are, too!] The shorter colt drew himself up.

[I didn't ASK.]

[Can I drive the car?] The little filly waved her hands in huge gestures.

[DRIVE!] The toddler demanded.

The human Nico burst out laughing. [Your generous offer has backfired, Snap.]

Lewis started laughing.

[Come on, little Racing Drivers,] Nico gestured, [Give papa another hug, let's go find Grandpa Keke and Ukkonen.] He hugged Snap. [Good luck, my friend.]


	12. Autographs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 2016 had been the biggest year in the history of Tame Racing Drivers. Some men had broadcast a show explaining their captivity, and freed the "stables." There had been 4 months of living in temporary camps until the laws of the world governments could be changed to recognize them as intelligent beings. After over 100 years, Racing Drivers, now called Stigs in honor of the broadcast, raced- not forced by the company under a human's name, with a human to give the interviews and receive the glory, but as themselves, interviews included. This was causing some confusion and much hilarity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Checo wants to practice his autograph.

[How should I sign my name?] Checo asked. He sat at a small table in the Toro Rosso motorhome with a notebook and marker in front of him. The blank page was daunting. He had begun to encounter fans that wanted his autograph, and he had no idea where to begin. He had been signing as “Checo Pèrez” for years when he was approached in the paddock for autographs, for it was also Sergio’s childhood nickname. Sergio sat down next to him.

[Do you want to continue signing as you have been? I can change mine.] Sergio replied. He wanted to make this as stress-free for Checo as possible. Checo stared off into space for a moment, thinking. He then moved his hand swiftly across the page, making a perfect check-mark. He then signed his last name as he always had. He looked at Sergio, waiting for a response. Sergio tilted his head to the side.

[I get it! Check-o. I like it. Very creative!] he applauded. Checo took his notebook and proudly marched over to the Haas garage to show Hulk his new signature. He returned a few minutes later with Hulk in tow. They sat across from each other, Hulk laying both hands face down on the table in front of Checo. He took his marker and signed the back of Hulk’s right hand. Sergio quickly double-checked that he had provided Checo with a washable marker, and sighed with relief when he realized he did. He waved Sergio over. 

[Can we have more colors?] He asked. Sergio nodded and dug around in the office, returning a few moments later with a box of scented markers. Nico soon wandered into the motorhome and stood next to Sergio, leaning his arm on the shorter man’s shoulder.

“I came to see where Hulk had ended up, but it seems you’ve got it under control.” Nico said, watching Checo doodling on his match’s hand and forearm. Hulk looked over to Nico.

[These markers smell like fruit! Sergio says we can’t taste them, though.] He said. Nico laughed and walked over to inspect Checo’s artwork. [I don’t mind if he draws on me, it’s relaxing. And I get to wear his art!] Hulk exclaimed. Checo continued his blue polka-dot pattern across the back of Hulk’s left hand. He turned his hand over and switched for a red marker. He drew a small heart to the right of Hulk’s thumb, looking up at him when he was finished. 

‘This is for if you miss me. Look, if you close your hand into a fist, you’re holding it.’ Checo said, closing his hand around Hulk’s as an example. Hulk’s eyes lit up.

‘I love it. I never want to wash it off.’ He replied, getting up to hug Checo tightly. He showed Nico, and he smiled approvingly. 

[We should get back to the garage, I think they want you to look over the car. They’ve made a few adjustments.] Nico said. Hulk nodded and waved goodbye to Checo, closing his hand over the heart.  
After Hulk had looked over the car and approved, they met up with Mark and Rabbit outside of the garage. They were walking around doing paddock interviews with anyone they came across. Rabbit lifted Hulk’s arm closer to his face, then showed it to the camera. Mark translated.

“It seems Hulk has become a canvas.” He stated. Hulk beamed.

[Yeah, Checo was practicing his new autograph and drawing. I love it!] Nico translated this as well. 

“Yeah, he refuses to push his sleeve down or wash his hands now.” Nico laughed, patting Hulk on the back.


	13. Professional

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 2016 had been the biggest year in the history of Tame Racing Drivers. Some men had broadcast a show explaining their captivity, and freed the "stables." There had been 4 months of living in temporary camps until the laws of the world governments could be changed to recognize them as intelligent beings. After over 100 years, Racing Drivers, now called Stigs in honor of the broadcast, raced- not forced by the company under a human's name, with a human to give the interviews and receive the glory, but as themselves, interviews included. This was causing some confusion and much hilarity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Chapter by Born In Captivity- Ineligible to Release (Jashasedai), I am posting on behalf!*   
> Mancha and Filipe have a moment in their garage.

The two sides of the McLaren garage were quiet, both teams just going about their business in an easy, professional manner.  
Mancha pulled himself out of the cockpit of the number 2 McLaren. 

[This feels just right, thank you,] he gestured to Rob. He jutted his chin towards the other side of the garage, [How is my teammate settling in?]  
Rob tilted his head in a half shrug, [You could ask him.]

[He doesn't want me checking up on him, he will think I question his ability.] 

[Do you?] The little Racing Driver took a drink of water. 

[Never once.]

The next time Mancha saw Rob, he was hovering in the lane outside the garage, behind Felipe. They both smiled hopefully at Mancha.  
He raised his hand in the come here gesture. Felipe approached. Mancha hopped up onto a toolbox at the back of the garage. He patted the surface beside him. Felipe hopped up as well. They sat still for awhile.  
Gradually, Mancha reached out and set his hand in Felipe's open and waiting hand.

'I love you,' they affirmed, quietly, inside.

'How is your car?' Felipe asked.

'It is good. How is yours?'

'Good. Fast enough to win.'


	14. Haas Hospitality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 2016 had been the biggest year in the history of Tame Racing Drivers. Some men had broadcast a show explaining their captivity, and freed the "stables." There had been 4 months of living in temporary camps until the laws of the world governments could be changed to recognize them as intelligent beings. After over 100 years, Racing Drivers, now called Stigs in honor of the broadcast, raced- not forced by the company under a human's name, with a human to give the interviews and receive the glory, but as themselves, interviews included. This was causing some confusion and much hilarity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Chapter by Born In Captivity- Ineligible to Release (Jashasedai), I am posting on behalf!*  
> Checo and Hulk have dinner in the Haas motorhome. They receive some little visitors.

Checo and Hulk ate fish tacos in team Haas's hospitality. 

[How is your car?] Checo gestured, then picked up a taco and took a bite. Checo was on Toro Rosso, he wasn't supposed to be in the Haas motorhome, but the rules had relaxed, everyone was sharing resources.

[Good. My right front tire mechanic takes 3 tries to change the tire.] He took the side of corn salsa off Checo's plate without asking and Checo took the tomatos off Hulk's. They'd been teammates for a long time. They knew each other's habits and preferences.

[Isn't she Fernando Alonso's sister?]

[Yes.]

5 little Racing Drivers sat down beside them. The oldest two were 8- Brno and Nico, the middle two were 5- Benz and Lousia and the youngest was 2- Mikael. The 5 year old filly was carrying the little filly awkwardly. She set her on the bench beside Hulk and sat on her other side. The other 3 were all carrying trays. Brno set down a tray in front of the two girls and took a place on the other side of the table, beside Nico, who was leaning across the table, straightening Louisa's tray. Hulk hugged the littlest filly.

Benz was sitting beside Checo. Without being asked, he pushed the tomatos from his plate onto Checo's. His older brother, Nico, nudged him disapprovingly. Brno shook his head at his brother, disapproving glances weren't going to work on Benz, he was too headstrong and sure of himself. Louisa started feeding Mikael tuna salad. Checo smiled at Hulk, happy their visitors were making themselves so comfortable. It was great they could be at the track to watch their father race, after years of being separated from their parents. Prince had retired after her championship, but Snap was still on the grid.

[This race will be the biggest I've ever seen. Not counting the 24 hours. Or Touring Car Races,] Nico told Checo.

[Or Rock Am Ring,] Lousia added.

[Formula 1 is bigger than Touring Car Races,] Hulk protested.

[Rock Am Ring is a concert, not a race,] Brno gestured.

[It's a big, loud event where there are too many people at the Ring to practice,] Louisa said firmly.  
Checo smiled to himself, it must have been easy for the foals, growing up in the nursery stable at the Nurburgring, the biggest, most intense track of them all, compared to some stables.


	15. Preparation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaamies (matched to Kimi Raikkonen) has retired, after long years of racing. He is present to support his best friend Sunshine (matched to Sebastian Vettel) and help him get ready for his first race under his own name.
> 
> Kimi and Sebastian also appear.

The room in the back of the garage was laid out neatly with Sunshine's race gear. Sunshine stood with his hands on the massage table. 'It's going to be like when you went to rally, I hate it when you aren't on the grid.'

Jaamies crossed his arms and shifted from foot to foot. 'You like Kleverig, it will be fun to be the older teacher.'

'Like you went from being the Rookie to being the teacher?' His hands tightened on the tables' edge.

'Being oldest is not bad.'

'Does Felipe count?'

'He is a Rookie and not a stallion.'

 

'I will be lonely.' He dropped his eyes.

'Not this time.' Jaamies set his hand on Sunshine's.

'Without you.'

'You have your teammate. You have your brothers.'

'I had Prince.'

'Not the same.'

'Neither is this. You're the only one I ever really...'

'Things were different for you, then.'

'Even Sugarboy is gone. It's just Snap and Checo.'

'Are you worried something will happen?'

'Like the last time? No.' He bit his lip.

'Liar.' Jaamies wrapped an arm around his chest. 'Kleverig will help you. Fili is here if it is not enough, but it will be enough, be strong.'

 

 

Jaamies touched Sunshine's shoulder. 'Time to get ready, Champion.'

Sunshine turned around and pulled his overalls up from around his waist. 'Heart,' Jaamies smiled at the use of his real name. 'It won't be like it was. Sebastian would give interviews for you. Kimi wouldn't have to.'

'Warmth,' Two could play the real names game, 'You remember when Kimi first took you from the stable and we went riding?'

Sunshine made a face.

'This is not where I was meant to be. Like you aren't meant to ride. I did this because it took me where I needed to be.'

 

  
Jaamies zipped Sunshine's overalls and brushed his shoulders. 'Now you look ready to show them what Ferrari can still do. There are Championships waiting for you.'

Sunshine caught his hands. 'I...'

With a chuckle, he pulled free and ruffled the younger stallion's buzzed short blonde hair. 'When are you going to let this grow back?'

He pulled on Jaamie's chin length hair. 'You've got enough for everyone. You look like Prince.'

He laughed. 'Take it back!'

There was a soft knock on the door.

'Your man is outside.'

'So is yours.'

'Will I get used to everyone knowing that?'

'No.'

 

  
Sunshine revved loudly.

The door opened, their matches came in. 'Are you ready, Sunshine?' Sebastian asked. His sending voice was higher than Kimi's. Jaamies looked away with a grin.

'Distracting him?' Kimi asked, roughhousing with Jaamies.

'Yes, now go away and come back later.'

They melted into each others space and watched the Reds fuss. 'Will Sebastian ever learn to speak out loud?' Jaamies asked, quietly, just to Kimi.

'I don't think his throat will stand it. I think he just gets one.'

'Shame. At least he has a beautiful singing voice, now he can finally join the singing.'

'Yes.'


	16. At The Cars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sunshine (matched to Sebastian Vettel) Jaamies (matched to Kimi Raikkonen) Sebastian, and Kimi go out as part of the team to setup Sunshine’s car on the grid.
> 
> Also Features Rabbit (matched to Mark Webber) and Alondra (matched to Fernando Alonso.)

They went out with the team to arrange Sunshine's car on the grid. As they walked between the cars a hand shot out and grabbed Sunshine's overalls. He was pulled into the space between a Redbull and a McLaren.

Rabbit was tall, still very powerfully built. He loomed over Sunshine. He was wearing civilian clothing, had let his accustomed scruff grow into a tightly trimmed beard. He had both hands fisted in Sunshine's red overalls. Redbull's Stigs had formed their own village. Rabbit, Redbull's first lead stallion, joined them.

Sunshine, who had taken his leadership away from him, did not.

 

Rabbit had raised Sunshine as his own. Sunshine had not hesitated to take Rabbit's place at the first opportunity. Had not hesitated to take every advantage, to win. To become stronger and faster than Rabbit.

The rivalry between them had been bitter, had given rise to vile deeds on both sides, had cost Sunshine the stable's respect and any chance his leadership had to survive, had cost Rabbit his championship and his Formula 1 career.

Rabbit leaned close, [Do your best, Champion,] He whispered between them, [I am proud of you, younger brother.]

Sunshine burst into ultimate pleasure. He beamed.

 

  
Rabbit hugged him.

When released, Sunshine turned to his family, grinning enormously. [My lead stallion is PROUD of me!] He laughed delightedly. [My Rabbit is proud of me!] He turned to the driver of the nearest car and hugged him. [My...dad is proud of me...] He faltered when he saw who he was hugging.

He let go and brushed Alondra off.

Alondra stopped him from fleeing. [He is very proud of you, Sunshine.]

[Thank you for helping us,]

Alondra smiled indulgently. [Someone had to do something.]

[I won't let you win, though.]

[I won't let you win, either.]

[Better not.]

 

  
Alondra pointed at Sebastian. [You have been practicing?]

Sebastian nodded wildly.

[Good, you will not disharmonize my chorus.] He pointed again, severely.

Sebastian shook his head.

[You,] Alondra pointed at Kimi, [Make sure he does not.]

Kimi nodded. [It's Felipe you have to worry about.]

Alondra looked at Jaamies.

Jaamies looked down.

[Iceman!] Alondra threw the sign.

[Felipe has been singing the whole time. Mancha can't sing at all.]

Kimi's mouth tightened. [You have always been entitled to your secrets. Have I ever pried?]

[YES!] Came the response from the immediate conversants and several cars around.

Kimi rolled his eyes.


	17. Battle Hymns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Racing Drivers sing the opening of the Race.

**2017 AU Grid**   
**Ferrari** Sunshine- Sebastian Vettel,  Kleverig- Kevin Magnussen  
 **Mercedes** Snap- Lewis Hamilton, Fili- Carlos Sainz Jr.  
 **Redbull** Alondra- Fernando Alonso,  Pilot- Max Verstappen  
 **McLaren** Felipe Massa, Mancha-Felipe Massa   
**Renault** Seven- Stoffel Vandoorne Alisar- Esteban Gutierrez  
 **Caterham** Valtteri Bottas, JEV-JeanEric Vergne, Reserve Driver: Pauli- Valtteri Bottas   
**Toro Rosso** Wendy- Francesca Linossi, Checo- Sergio Perez  
 **Sauber** Goose- Romain Grosjean, Tenner- Jolyon Palmer   
**Haas** Hulk-Nico Hulkenberg, Bandera- Tatiana Calderon  
 **Manor** Leif- Marcus Ericsson Lynx- Alex Lynn   
**Force India** Mick Schumacher, Gee- Guiliano Alesi

 

Sebastian and Kimi sat at the side of the Ferrari garage, eyes closed.

The song Racing Drivers send to each other, and into the place around them cannot be described in words. It is a rhythm of feelings, impressions, senses and memories. As the teams left the grid, leaving the 22 cars idling, the song started, and rose.

It started with Alondra, the strongest singer on the grid. Younger and softer, but beautifully tuned, Tumba joined from the sidelines. With him he brought the Redbull boys, and, out of habit, with Jaamies gone from the grid, Sunshine raised his voice with his brothers. Jaamies followed on his heels. Rabbit, deep and pure, sang out from the press box.

Kimi's voice, a totally different range and timbre than the rest, added a thrum that sent chills through everyone listening. A moment later, Sebastian launched into his debut, with a beautiful, high pitch that reflected the newness of his gift.

With a hint of impatience for Redbull impropriety, Snap and Prince rang in soaring harmony. Barely audible, 5 little voices joined them, then boldly, Ukkonen, and shyly, Kaiser.

The previous year's back markers all rose as one, and Gee, Lynx and Seven stumbled in behind them, quickly finding their places. Pauli matched his voice to Alisar's. Freeza sang with him. The other Top Gear Stigs came with her, and then, suddenly, two new voices, and one they all knew sang out with remarkable clarity and confidence.

Two feminine voices, Wendy and Bandera, more adept in expression than any Racing Drivers seen on the Formula 1 grid in many years, sang in practiced harmony with the deep double hum of Felipe and Mancha, in the perfect synchrony the two had perfected on being matched.

The other Racing Drivers present but not driving, sang into the song, with voices strong and weak, high and low.

A deep, soft undercurrent, with a soft, high counterpart made Kimi and Sebastian both open their eyes and stare at each other. Sebastian had tears. Kimi had tears as well. Sebastian had waited his whole life to hear Shoe sing, and Kimi had thought, years ago, that the privalege was lost.

Sebastian laughed through the tears. "Michael told me Shoe was not a great singer. It really is true." He held his hand out and Kimi took it.

"It will never be like this again. There will never be as many of them like this. THIS is the day he was waiting for. All of them. Under the sun."


End file.
